Peace is a beautiful thing. There is nothing as satisfying as being at peace with yourself and the decisions that you have made. However, regrets have a way of snatching that peace right from under us and breeding a life of torment and suffering. Regrets usually seep in when we go over our lives and our day, and we begin to analyze the decisions that we have made. We realize that some may not have been the best decisions, and years have gone by, but that gnawing feeling won't leave you alone. "I should not have…" is the statement we all say to ourselves sometimes, and that steals our joy and peace. To live a peaceful life, regrets must be done away with. It is not an easy process but one that can be done.
Make amends.
We all say things we do not mean or do things we regret at some point one way or another. However, find the person and make amends for the thing you regret. This is the simplest way to get rid of regrets. For example, as a parent, you yell at your child unnecessarily, we have been there, and the guilt and the shame start eating at you. The best way out of the situation is to make amends. Making amends allows you to see things from that person's perspective, and one can be forgiven, and sometimes one may not be forgiven, but the fact that you owned up and made an effort to make amends will bring you peace.
Regret is not only in how we treat people but also in the opportunities we let go of. You are offered an opportunity, but because of fear, you do not take the opportunity. Now you are regretting not taking the chance. Call up that person, you may get a second chance. The challenge most of us face is that we shy away from making the call because it is embarrassing, or that it seems like we are begging and it is somewhat beneath us. This is the reason regrets go on for so long.
The past belongs in the past, but the future is yours to have
The best way to get peace and get rid of regrets is to leave the past right where it belongs, in the past. Make an effort to move on with your life the best way your know-how. Look for other opportunities, meet other people and work on those things. Rehashing the past will not in any way change it. It will just frustrate you more. Thus it is better to leave things as they are and forge a new path going forward. Regrets are usually a thing of the past. The best way to let them go is to focus on the here and the now. Living in the present means actively living out your best life despite what happened in the past. Being at peace or choosing peace does not mean that you do not feel bad if it concerns something you did and regret. Choosing peace means you are willing to give yourself another chance at life and not allowing what you did to steal your joy. This does not negate that you feel awful about your actions. It does not mean that you do not seek forgiveness. It means that you can still feel terrible and seek forgiveness and that you desire a life without regrets.
If you cannot change something, change how you think about it
More often than not, the way we remember things is not always how things have played out. We remember things according to our emotions, the way we see and view things, our belief systems, and so many other social constructs. Ever been there where an issue gives you sleepless nights until you see that person or call them to apologize, and they tell you there is nothing to apologize for because they did not see things the way you did. Well, this is the same with regrets. You may beat yourself up for making a particular decision, yet it was not that big a deal. Instead of beating yourself up for being human, why not choose to think of yourself in a more kind and forgiving manner? Look for the silver lining in the dark cloud. Understand that everything, either good or bad, happens for a reason, and good or bad is only how you see things. If you saw things differently, the outcome may surprise you.
In closing, peace is good for the soul, and we all deserve to live a peaceful life. Part of being human is that we will all make mistakes at one point, but punishing yourself by carrying the burden of regret does not help any situation. If there is a chance to make it right, do. If not, choose to move forward with your life without the burden of regret. Being regretful is not synonymous with being sorry for your actions. It's a burden that you can put down and still remorseful about your actions. So, do what you can to get rid of regrets and get some peace.
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