We are in a period of time where, for many years, there have been legitimate reasons for people to think their goals were unattainable. But that has been forever altered, and the excuses we once clung to have dissipated with myriad solutions and options available to us. 

It does not matter what goal you have been striving to reach –financial success, weight loss, or something else – you have what you need now to get things done, as long as you are willing to do them. 

If you think about it, this has always been true. The biggest obstacle to our success is us. Our mindset, our refusal to find the answers and consistently do the work is what holds us back. 

But instead of accepting responsibility, we tend to blame it on something outside of our control, like a lack of money to pay for the right “fix.” It is easy to get mired down in a cycle of excitement and excuses, where one day we feel motivated and the next hopeless.

A Lack of Money Is not Standing in Your Way.

Money is often used as an excuse for people not to be able to do the things they feel will change their lives. People will complain that they cannot eat healthy because produce is too expensive or they cannot start an online business because they cannot afford to.

Neither of these things is true. It is simply a choice of what we allow ourselves to believe. If you are an online entrepreneur, you do not have to invest in expensive site-building tools, keyword research and SEO tools, and courses that break the bank. 

You can start a business online for $0 and start pouring your profits back into the mix, but you have to be smart enough to choose a business model that allows for that, like affiliate marketing.

If you want to eat healthier, you can buy produce in season (and less expensive), on sale in bulk, or at a local farmer’s market at a cheaper price. You can even grow your product for next to nothing by investing in seeds.

If you feel money is holding you back, you have not tried to find a workaround because money is not an obstacle if you want to do something significant to make changes.

You can also take a look at the money you are wasting in life (Starbucks, streaming cable, etc.) and use that money if there’s something you want to afford to reach a goal – but that requires a sacrifice that makes people feel uncomfortable, so it is easier to use a blanket excuse as to why you can’t do it.

You Have the Time to Do Anything You Put Your Mind To 

Time is another excuse people often mention when they feel like they are being held back. After a long day at work, you do not have time to shop for and prepare healthy food.

You do not have time to start a business online when you already work full-time offline, right? Yet that is exactly what millions of others in the same boat do. 

So, you have to correct your wording to say, “I do not want to spend time doing that.” Because that is the truth, you can meal prep one day on the weekend to have nutritious food all week.

 You can build your business little by little in your spare time after work and on the weekends. You do not have to be able to devote 8 hours a day to succeed as an online entrepreneur – you have to get started.

 And once you evaluate how your hours and minutes are spent each day, you will realize there’s a lot of waste, too. Sometimes you could be learning and working, but you are not – you’re watching mindless TV, commuting with the radio on, or eating lunch while on social media. 

Use your time strategically; you will do it if you have to wake up 30 minutes earlier to have half an hour each day to progress toward your goal. But only if you truly want it without letting excuses weigh you down.

There is Enough Free Info to Teach You Everything You Want to Know

Another excuse often used when people analyze why they have not been able to achieve their goals is a lack of knowledge. It is easy to say you do not know how to do something, but you cannot use that excuse anymore because the Internet has brought a world of information to your fingertips. 

Online resources and offline meetups in your local area, libraries, and other sources can provide you with the information you need. However, if you have access to the Internet, you can learn about anything you hope to learn that will help you achieve your dreams. 

For example, if you do not know how to lose weight, you can look up many strategies that will help you find something that works for your personal preferences and health needs. 

If you need to know how to lose weight to improve your blood pressure, there are free sites with information about what foods to eat, what exercise you should do, and calorie calculators that can make things easy. 

If you want to know how to start your website or blog and earn money from it, endless YouTube videos will teach you step-by-step so that you can follow along and act with the person teaching it. 

There are even free tutorials for more advanced topics. But you must use your keyboard and Internet connection to search for your desired answers.

Even if you cannot find something readymade and outlined or answered for you, there are sites such as Quora or niche forums that you can sign up on and ask questions of the other members to find the answers you need to know. 

Just befriending other people with the same interests and goals can help you significantly, and none of this costs you a single penny. But it is easier to shrug it off as a dilemma where you don't have answers so that you will remain stuck.

You Have the Ability to Try, Fail and Succeed 

The truth is, just about everyone who has succeeded at the same goal you have in mind has failed more than once on their journey to success. Very few people start and take a direct path to the finish line. 

Most people stumble when they are on a weight loss journey. They may have setbacks, such as a plateau, or they may lose weight, regain it, and have to do it all over again. 

Some people start a business online and cannot seem to gain traction in building a list or getting their site ranked in Google. But instead of giving up and throwing their hands in the air in frustration, some people power through the failures until they achieve the success they are after. 

Others will fail in their journey and never get back up because the sting of failure is too much for them. It does not matter that everyone else before them had the same obstacles – it is easier to be able to say they tried than to admit they do not want to try again.

Perseverance and Consistency Will Turn the Tides in Your Favor

There are only two things you need to overcome this struggle of using excuses: the ability to persevere through obstacles and consistency in your efforts. If you are armed with those two traits, nothing can stop you. 

This is necessary in any aspect of life – your relationships, health, financial success – it is always needed everywhere. So, how do you adapt them to your life? 

It is not going to happen overnight. You will feel uncomfortable when you use these two traits. But you will also quickly feel empowered and unstoppable – and when that kicks in, it will feel amazing. 

Looking back on past failures and seeing where you fought back until you emerged victorious is a powerful feeling that lends to more success in the future. It will push you forward with momentum to do the things you always thought were unattainable. 

If you try to tackle too much all at once, you’ll be setting yourself up for failure. If you’re trying to eat healthier, start with a healthy breakfast daily, and do not worry as much about lunch and dinner until you master breakfast.

Or you could start by ensuring you eat one fruit and one vegetable daily – small steps that get the ball rolling. The key is to progress with incremental change to do more until your life is transformed. 

As an online entrepreneur, you could dedicate small increments of time to learning the ropes and taking action, such as devoting one hour per week (either all at once or broken up into 10-15 minute blocks) and then work on adding more time until you have the new career in place.

You Can Block Saboteurs and Surround Yourself with Mentors 

One thing that will be hard for many people to do, but absolutely necessary – is to block the enablers (also known as saboteurs) who do not care if you succeed or fail or who secretly want you to.

They may not do it knowingly, but they can hold you back if they coddle you with your excuse mindset – or if they’re jealous and don’t want to feel bad about their lack of success in certain areas. 

These will be the people who urge you to stop working on your business and do something with them instead or who tempt you to go off your diet this one time. These people are not good for your goals, and you must keep them at arm’s length until you are strong enough to push back. 

Instead, surround yourself with other go-getters who feel unstoppable, can lift you up, and believe in you as you strive for great things to unfold in your life. You can find them online and in person, and they may not even be on the same path, but I love to see others shine. 

Success is not unattainable for you. It’s not out of your reach or too complex. It’s there, ready and waiting – and as of today, there is no longer any viable excuse for you to embrace failure as your destiny.

Making a great first impression isn’t always easy, but it’s well worth attempting as much as you possibly can. To help you make it happen more often, here are three simple rules you should always follow. While they are not the only great advice on making a good first impression, they are the things that will have the biggest impact – whether you get them right or wrong. I suggest you get them right.

Rule #1 – Dress To Impress  

Pay attention to what you’re wearing. This may seem very superficial, but that’s what first impressions are all about. They are a first, quick judgment based on things like appearance. Overdress just a little if it’s an important first meeting like going to a job interview or meeting the future in-laws for the first time. 

At the very least make sure that what you’re wearing is neat and flattering. Don’t go crazy and when in doubt go for something somewhat conservative. You can always let your personality shine after you’ve made that great first impression.

Rule #2 – Be On Time  

Just as important to remember is to always be on time. It makes you look prepared and reliable. But there’s another important reason for this. The world is made up of two types of people. The first group is a stickler for time. They will not waste your time. Nor will they want their own time to be wasted. Being late is one of their biggest pet peeves. The other group has a more loose interpretation of being on time and doesn’t mind waiting for someone for a few minutes, or being late themselves. 

The problem is that you never know what camp the person you’re about to meet will fall into ahead of time. So be prepared and make sure you get there on time or even a little early. It’ll look good no matter how the person you’re meeting will feel about time and it will definitely keep you from making a bad impression with a time stickler. 

Rule #3 – Think Before You Speak

Last but not least, think before you speak. It’s easy to get nervous and just prattle on about anything and everything. It makes you look nervous and silly. Even worse, if you don’t think before you talk it’s very easy to put your foot in your mouth. Trust me, I’ve done it plenty of times. It’s not a good feeling and definitely a quick and easy way to ruin that first impression.

Reading is not only a great way to learn. It is a beautiful way to relax. Reading is one of the best steps you can take for self-improvement. Reading opens you up to a whole new world of ideas, skills, and viewpoints that will challenge you. Becoming an avid reader will develop over time, but it will be worth it. If you want to develop the reading habit, but have been struggling, then try these steps out.

1. Begin with a Subject You Love
If you want to develop the habit of reading, then reading something you enjoy is the right choice. Starting a new habit takes discipline. Do not make it twice as hard by trying to read something you think you should read. Read something you want to read.

2. Challenge Yourself
Do you like a challenge? Then Goodreads is the perfect tool for a reading challenge. It is a yearly challenge you set for yourself. It tells you how many books you read so far and the percent of the challenge you have completed.

3. Audio Books Fit Anywhere
This might be controversial in some circles. The way to deal with this is do not talk to those people about reading an audiobook. But don’t dismiss audiobooks. Utilize the time when you otherwise can’t read (i.e., driving or walking). Remember when you were young, and adults read to you? This was an enjoyable experience. When the right person is reading the audiobook, it is a real pleasure.

4. An eBook Subscription
An eBook subscription is just another way to find interesting things to read. eBooks are light, and you can carry them with you ensuring you always have something to read.

5. Goodreads Reading Log
Goodreads is an excellent tool for keeping track of the books you read. They have a yearly challenge you set for yourself. It is an excellent way to keep yourself motivated. Your confidence will build as your list grows. We are competitive by nature. The challenge you set will keep you moving forward. The reading log is useful to look up books you have already read. You can also make a list of books you would like to read.

6. Schedule Reading Time
The biggest claim is “lack of time” when it comes to reading. There is only one way to fix that? Make time. Get your schedule out and cross something out and put reading time in that slot. Tv time, Facebook, listening to the radio, worrying about your life, these are all activities that are a good babysitter but are little value if you want to improve your life.

7. Get Comfortable
Get ready by getting comfortable then start reading. Find that spot and settle in. Adequate lighting is essential, and a cup of coffee will not hurt. Although I find it gets cold before I finish it.

8. Don’t Get Caught up in Finishing
The goal is to develop the habit of reading. Stick to your schedule to start. Do not take away from tasks you need to do. Use time that is not constructive. Digesting what you read while you are not reading helps comprehension. Finishing a book in one sitting is not the goal.

9. Join a Book Club
Joining a book club is an excellent idea for people wanting to read more. There is added accountability, knowing you have to discuss the book with others regularly. Plus, you might enjoy the social aspect of it as well.

Body language is what gets you noticed or left by the wayside. A person who shows they are competent and confident will stand out in every interaction, while the one who is meek and self-effacing is likely never to be noticed at all.

How then do you use body language to get yourself noticed in all the right ways? 

Remember, You’re Superman

If you think of pictures you’ve seen of the comic book hero, Superman, you’ll likely picture someone standing firmly on two feet, hands-on-hips, shoulders back, and head up, every inch the hero. There is nothing in his posture to imply he’s not confident and perfectly capable of whatever is thrown his way. Studies prove that standing in the Superhero pose for a few minutes before a meeting or discussion; you aren’t feeling confident about will change your whole demeanor during the interaction. 

Where’s That Smile?

Things not going well? Try smiling. No fake grin allowed, though. Instead, find a happy thought and pull out a genuine smile. It will immediately shift your brain chemistry and put you on a more even keel. Better than that, it’ll likely pull up a smile from your audience as well. 

Play all the Angles

When confrontation brews, it’s time to defuse the situation. Rather than step back, shift sideways. Oddly enough, a 45-degree angle has the strange effect of calming people down, mostly because standing facing someone can feel aggressive, and turning away gives the wrong message.

Go for the Quick Charisma Points

Talk with your hands—a lot. Using expansive gestures while talking makes you more approachable and engaging and wins more support than someone stiff and awkward. 

Break Down their Resistance

Talking to someone who is so closed off, they’ve got their arms crossed tight against their chest? Break their pose. Offer them something, a business card, or a bottle of water. Make them shift their position to take it, and they’ll change their attitude toward one more favorable to you. 

Where’s All that Energy?

Are you lagging a little? It’s time to dial things up a notch. Focus on a time when you felt high energy and ready to take on the world. Now channel your energy and bring it to the conversation. Watch the magic happen. 

Don’t Look Away Mostly

In the course of the conversation, it’s nearly impossible to maintain eye contact while thinking. With this in mind, maintain your eye contact until the point where you need to consider your words. It’s okay to drop your eyes to consider the matter, so long as you regain eye contact before you begin your answer. 

By paying attention to your body language, life will begin to change for the better. Body language is the cornerstone of success waiting for you in your work and personal life. You really can be everything you’ve always dreamed you could be.

Journaling is not just for 12-year-old girls! Journaling can be a powerful weapon in your get-it-done arsenal, and it’s easy to do. You can and should put all kinds of things in a goal journal, not just your thoughts and feelings on a given day.

Journaling is just one way of tracking your actions and successes, and yes, even your setbacks and failures. It also keeps your goal right in front of your face, so you stay on top of taking action steps every day. It keeps all your ideas and revelations in one place so you can go back and review whenever you want. For example, you are having trouble getting motivated because you feel like you’ve been working hard, but making little progress, going back into your goal journal is a wonderful way to help you see that all of those small actions are paying off in a big way. So what should you keep in your goal journal? Start with these ideas and add to them as you see fit.

1. Detailed goal--Write down your exact goal in as much detail as possible. Describe it in a way that makes you feel excited about what your life will be like when you achieve your objective.
2. Your Why--Your Why is the big reason why you want to reach the goal you have defined for yourself. It’s the reason you are willing to take the massive action steps needed to change your life for the better.
3. Massive action plans and schedule--When you make the plan for how you will go about reaching your goal, write it here. Writing it down is essential so that you can track your efforts so you can see what actions are creating the most results.
4. Braindumps--A brain dump is just a list of actions that you need to take in no particular order. Sometimes all the tasks you need to take build up in your head, making you confused about where you should start and what you should do next.
5. Prioritize--After you do a brain dump, organize the tasks into a priority list and add them to your daily and weekly to-do lists.
6. Daily to-do list--Write out your to-do lists here, so they are always handy.
7. Aha’s--As you take massive action, you will have inspiration or aha moments when something becomes apparent. Capture those ideas here so that you can refer to them later when you are ready to put them into action.
8. Journal entries--Yes, you should journal. Sometimes there’s nothing better than a stream of consciousness writing to help you solve a problem or get your worries off your chest. It’s a therapeutic and inspirational way to work.

If you were to develop one skill to help you to get ahead in all aspects of life, what would it be? You would develop the habit of learning.

Studies have shown that by far, the best advantage you can give yourself is to become a lifelong learner. Why? Because without learning, the mind stagnates.

Thankfully, becoming a lifelong learner isn’t hard. Below are ten easy ways to build a habit of learning that will serve you in years to come.

Commit

Unless you make lifelong learning a priority, you’re not going to enjoy success. You start with committing to change and then go from there.

Create a Personalized Learning Environment

True learning results when you take charge of your learning environment. Sit down with your mentor and make concrete goals. Set up a system that enables you to learn and a setting in which you can learn. Once you have this, you are genuinely ready to begin.

Read

Read books, magazines, news articles, academic journals, and anything that catches your attention. If it’s interesting to you, then it’s worth pursuing.

Keep a List

Have a question? Write it down. Come back to this list later and Google the answers. Let this become the jumping-off point for learning new things.

Create

Create a project out of one of the things you find interesting. Set goals, give a timeline, and a final deadline to complete it. Invite others to take part in your project with you. You learn so much more when you collaborate. Create milestones and celebrate each one on your road to completion.

Socialize

Hang out with smart people who also enjoy learning. These will become your encouragers and mentors along the way.

Become a Mentor Yourself

We all have something we’re good at and could teach. Your particular skill set might be what someone else needs to succeed. By getting involved in mentoring, you find yourself not only cementing the knowledge you already have but learning new things as well.

Try Different Learning Styles

If you’ve always thought of yourself as one kind of learner, try a new way to learn. You’ll stimulate your brain in new and exciting ways.

Study with Others

When you work with a group, it’s generally easier to learn as you can draw upon the base of shared knowledge. That, in turn, helps you to discover new things yourself. 

Seek out a Job that Encourages Lifelong Learning

The final step toward lifelong learning is to find work where you are encouraged to learn new things, and which continually challenges you. 

Remember, develop the habit of learning will lead to lifelong of learning rely on repetition. Engage in these activities as often as possible, making them a part of every single day if you can for optimal success.

No one likes to fail, but everyone fails at some point in their lives. For many people, the fear of failure is paralyzing and stops them from overcoming failure and reaching their goals.

The fear of failure creates negative self-talk that keeps people from learning and growing.

Overcoming the fear of failure is a necessary step in achieving personal goals and being successful. Scientists, psychologists, and business leaders have studied the fear of failure and how people can overcome it.

Overcoming the fear of failure is divided into three areas:

1. Preparing for Fear of Failure
2. Confronting Fear of Failure
3. Recovering from Failure

How a person prepares for and confronts fear determines how well they can overcome it. Recovering from failure helps people overcome fear in future situations.  Scientists have developed specific steps in each area to help people learn to overcome the fear of failure.

Preparing for Fear of Failure

A person must be prepared to face failure to overcome the fear of it. The right mindset minimizes the fear of failure and puts it into perspective.  While the fear of failure is a part of the achievement, overcoming the fear requires understanding what failure is and how to learn from it.

The steps to prepare for fear of failure are:

• Redefine Failure
• Find Benefits from Past Failures
• Understand Threats
• Create Approach, not Avoidance Goals

Redefining failure can change a person’s perception and fear level. Industry leaders in Forbes business magazine suggest that redefining failure as learning opportunities helps overcome fear.

It would not be a failure if a person learned something useful from experience, even if what they discovered was that they didn’t have the right plan to succeed.

Psychologists suggest redefining failure as discrepancies, or simply times when outcomes didn’t meet expectations. When failure is defined in less personal terms or as learning experiences, there is less to fear.

To redefine fear, a person should look to their past failures and consider the benefits they received during those times.  Learning a better way, discovering a new path, and realizing a plan didn’t work all provide benefits to overcoming failure in the future.

When a person uses the information and experiences they gained from previous failures, they have less to fear because they already know what to avoid.

People perceive failure as a threat.  Because failure stops people from reaching their goals, they see it as a threat to their desires.  Scientists at the University of California Berkley concluded that when people perceive a threat, their bodies prepare to fight it.

Physically, a person’s breathing and heart rate increase, and they go into “fight or flight” mode. Preparing to fight is negative stress on a person’s body and mind and can cloud their judgment, increasing their fear.  These scientists suggest that a person should view failure as a challenge, not a threat.  By viewing failure as a challenge, a person can calmly and logically think through the problem and find a way to overcome it, decreasing their fear response.

To redefine a threat as a challenge, a person needs to visualize the obstacles they face.  They need to determine if their fear is based on a real or imagined threat.  People often fear failure because they think of the worst-case scenario, instead of focusing on positive ways to reach their goals and avoid failure.  Facing a challenge holds less fear than facing a threat. 

Once a person has redefined failure, the next step is to create goals that approach success, not avoid failure.  Approach goals focus on positive outcomes:  learning something new, achieving a level of success, or growing to fill a need.

Avoidance goals focus on negative consequences: not freezing up during a presentation, not missing a deadline, or not falling short of a quota. Approach goals provide positive reinforcement while avoidance goals create fear of failure.

Confronting Fear of Failure

When confronting the fear of failure, a person must accept fear as an emotion and move past it.

The steps to moving forward instead of letting fear stop a person include:

• Let the Fear of Failure Pass
• Change Goals as the Situation Develops
• Build Confidence

Fear is a human emotion. Everyone feels fear.  Business leaders describe feeling the fear of failure when they started, but they acknowledged that fear and kept trying.

If a person’s goals are powerful enough, they can confront their fear of failure with a definite plan. When the desire for success is greater than the fear of failure, definite goals help a person overcome the fear.

People are often paralyzed by fear of failure when their plan isn’t working. They may start strong but begin to fear failure during a complicated process.  Psychologists suggest changing the goals in these situations.

Redefining failure by adjusting the goals limits fear. When forces beyond a person’s control block the path to success, a more limited goal can help a person to still achieve some success without fearing a complete failure. 

During the process of carrying out a plan, a person also needs to build their confidence.  Leaders at the Harvard Business Review suggest focusing on what a person learns along the way to build confidence for the next step in the process.

The fear of failure decreases when a person has confidence in their prior decisions and achievements. By reminding themselves of what they have already done, a person takes the next step to overcoming failure.

Recovering from Failure

Even with the best intentions, any plan can lead to failure. Many successful people have failed multiple times.  When a person does fail, they need to recover positively from the experience.

The steps to recovering from failure include:

• Treating Yourself Kindly
• Accepting Mistakes
• Learning from the Experience

People often berate themselves more harshly for failure then they would another person.  Here again, the scientists at the University of California Berkley point out that treating yourself kindly after failure helps stop a person from fearing failure in the future.

If a person makes the repercussions of failure too hard on themselves, they may develop a negative self-image or negative self-talk that causes them to fear the next challenge.

A person also needs to accept their mistakes when they fail.  Without admitting responsibility, they will repeat their mistakes over and over, limiting their success and developing a greater fear of failure each time they face a challenge.  Overcoming failure includes preparing for the next challenge by accepting mistakes and correcting them.

If a person views failure as a learning experience, there is more to gain from failure and less to fear.  Educators teach students that failure isn’t the end of learning.  Instead, failure is the beginning of success.

Recovering from failure involves learning from the experience, so a person is better prepared to succeed when facing another challenge. Fear of failure is often fear of an unknown outcome.  Learning from failure removes that fear because a person knows what does lead to failure and can make another choice instead.

Final Thoughts

Scientists understand that overcoming the fear of failure is based on human emotion and perception.

Overcoming the fear of failure involves defining failure more positively and using skills and abilities to confront it. When a person does fail, they can improve their outlook and limit fear by using failure as a learning experience. Overcoming failure can be accomplished by taking these steps.

Like anything in life, there is always going to be the good and the bad. Roses are beautiful, and they have a powerful fragrance. However, many have thorns that can pierce even the thickest of leather gardening gloves.

Two main points comprise the dark side of improvement.

First

Understand that there is no magic pill for self-improvement. Self-improvement is a process which takes time, effort, and planning. It can’t be as simple as taking the black or white.

We are creatures that like comfort. Therefore, we tend to wait for the pain to motivate us. Self-improvement is a choice you make to fulfill that part of our DNA that gives us the drive to create a better world. When you were a child, first learning how to ride your bike, your father did all he could to prepare you for that first ride. He showed you how to balance the bike, pedal, and control its direction. However, despite his best attempts at keeping you balanced, you probably fell a few times before you got the hang of riding a bike.

Pain doesn’t have to be bad, nor dysfunctional, as long as we learn from it.

As you move through your plan for self-improvement, expect to fall so that you can get back up stronger.

Disappointment

Every year we make resolutions, only for most of us to give up on them before February rolls around. You start with all of the enthusiasm you can have to support your optimistic belief that this will finally be the year you accomplish…

Only, in the end, you end up with disappointment as your enthusiasm fades, and self-discipline is required to reach the goal.

Understand that while the concept of self-improvement can turn into something of a rabbit hole for us, it can be a powerful tool.

God instilled in us the need to create and produce. Naturally, we feel a need for improvement. It can become toxic for those of us who see this need for growth as a flaw. Our society has labeled anyone with the drive to succeed as having an addiction. It is not an addiction; it is a God-given drive.

Going back to the bike analogy: That child, be they you or someone else, approached that bike ready to learn how to ride without training wheels. He was excited. However, the first time he fell off, he probably felt a twinge of discouragement.

It’s important to remember that he didn’t approach that bike with the knowledge of how to balance it. He likely knew how to operate it mechanically thanks to the safety of his training wheels. But just because he could still improve on his ability to ride doesn’t mean he was fundamentally flawed. It just means that he had room to grow and something to learn. He had a way to improve.

Growth

Also, bear in mind, that like the child learning how to ride a bike with training wheels, the point of growth in self-improvement doesn’t occur when the goal is attained. It happens when we learn each step of the way.

A child who is learning to ride their bike without training wheels is probably going to fall. For older generations, this entailed some form of knee skinning. Regardless, the entire experience is a learning moment passed down from one generation to the next.

We tend to see our goals just beyond our reach. When we stumble while reaching, it’s essential to remember that the stumble or trip-up is a learning moment — not a failure. The dark side and toxicity come when we throw in the towel when we stumble rather than getting back up.

Avoid Self-Judgment

As a side note, remember that you are always going to be your sharpest critic. Not criticizing yourself doesn’t mean that you should not evaluate your actions. The process of self-improvement requires honest assessment, not self-judgment, and there is a big difference. When you judge, you believe that you see a finished product. With a flawed finished product, it is thrown on the scrap heap, and you start over. Self-improvement requires you to hold yourself to a higher standard without using a whip.

Image by StockSnap from Pixabay

Ways to achieve goals is through the five steps we list below. We need balance to live a happy and healthy life; everything in this world comes down to finding the proper balance. Whether it’s in work life and home life, eating healthy and eating what makes you happy, doing stuff for others without neglecting yourself, etc., everything works better and goes more smoothly when you’ve got a balance. 

Achieving said balance isn’t the easiest thing, but we’ve come up with five ways to introduce more balance into your life and get things going in the right direction.

1) Prioritize

Prioritizing and scheduling can be a great practice to start introducing more of a sense of balance to your life. We all have busy lives and long to-do lists; the only way we’ll ever get everything done and find balance in our lives is by prioritizing what needs to be done when and scheduling our days.

The tricky part to this is deciding just what is important; in some cases, your work may take priority, but in others, family or friends may take priority over your work on your to-do list. Only you can decide what’s important and what should be prioritized in your schedule when.

2) Set Goals

Setting both long-term and short-term goals are ways to achieve goals and can prove to be incredibly helpful in achieving a balance in your life. It helps you keep your sights on what you want and what’s important, avoiding too much straying from your path. The short-term goals help you to track your progress as you work to achieve your long-term goals, and help you stay on track.

3) Be specific in your schedule and review it

If, in order to achieve more balance, your goals were to, say, spend more time watching cooking shows, you’re more likely to complete it by saying “watch The Barefoot Contessa and Iron Chef every Tuesday and Thursday evening at 5,” then if you say “watch cooking shows at least twice a week.” Don’t set yourself up for failure.

Once you’ve completed your schedule and are sure that you’re specific in the goals you want to achieve and the steps necessary to get there, you should review your schedule. This is an incredibly important step allowing you to reflect on your goals and priorities to ensure everything is as you need it.

4) Find an accountability buddy

An accountability buddy is someone that holds you accountable for the goals you’ve made, the priorities you’ve set, and the things you’ve said you’ve wanted to do and accomplish. It’s easier to find balance and stick to your goals and schedule when you have someone to be accountable to that’s is also accountable to you.

Your relationship with your accountability buddy should be interactive and mutual. If you’re not pulling your weight or your carrying more than your load, you could be hurting yourself more than you’re helping.

5) Always keep the process in mind

Life isn’t just about what you achieve and what you get; it’s about the journey, the process. To achieve a proper balance, you need to always keep in mind that it’s more the process than the potential achievement.

For example, you can make your goal to win a Nobel prize in literature, or you can make it be paid to write for your career. The latter is a more achievable goal that focuses on the process and journey more than the achievement or prize at the end.

Everyone needs balance to live a happy and healthy life. Finding the proper balance in your life can be difficult, but it’s not impossible, and it’s well worth the effort. We hope this article will help to point out the ways to achieve goals that are important to you. These five points will guide you on the right path towards a healthy balance in your life.

Image by mohamed Hassan from Pixabay

What is success really all about? Is it about things? Is it about material possessions? Is it about the way other people see you when you're successful? Is it about adulation and fame? Think about your answers to these questions. Think big like a child. You see, there are correct answers to all of these questions, and none of those answers are yes.  Material possessions are a side effect of success. So is money. So are praise, recognition, and authority. All these things are signifiers of success, but none of them are success itself. So then, what is success really all about?

To answer this question correctly, you have to let go of your adult self and all of your adult preconceptions and prejudices. You have to think back to when you were a child. You have to remember what it was like to be a child. You have to readopt a child’s worldview. You have to repossess a child’s motivations. In short, you have to, once again, begin thinking like a child.

How does a child define success? Think big like a child. A child defines a victory by the goal. A child succeeds when he or she gets what they want. They are not deterred by the word no. They are not stopped by their own inner voice. They do not care what others think of their goal or their behavior in trying to achieve that goal. You could say that a child is nearly 100% goal oriented.

A child also sees the universe as limitless and the possibilities within that universe as infinite. This means that a child does not feel constrained by any self-imposed restraints. The child also doesn't feel constrained by outside forces. If the child can conceive of something, then the child feels that they can achieve that something. This lack of constraint and restraint further feeds the child's laser focus on their goal.

A child is innocent as well. This innocence is not a bad thing. In fact, it is a shield protecting the child from worry and fear when it comes to goals. The child doesn't worry about failure and the outcomes of failure. The child has not been taught about eventualities. There are no eventualities.  They only see the goal.

Think big like a child and adopt a child's point of view when it comes to your ventures. A child's point of view is a useful way of examining your behaviors to see where imagined constraints and fears are keeping you from fully engaging in big thinking.

Yes, You can be anything you want to be.  Remember when as a child you dreamt about becoming an astronaut, president, sports hero and the list goes on. At first, the adults were supportive and told you-you could become anything you wanted to be as long as you put your mind to it.  But you found out that their actions did not back those statements up. For they started to indoctrinate you into conformity and play it safe to get a good job, get married, and buy a house. 

When they told you-you could be anything you want to be, they had it right. Those dreams are possible.  With all the technological advances it is easier today.

How to be Whatever You Want to be

 Following your dream is easy. When you are not doing your job or busy with something that your present life needs you to do, what do you think and talk about? Is it being on the water boating? Then start to read about boats, marinas, sailing, and kayaking... Seek out people that have boats. Seek out people that make a living with boats. Congratulations

You will not be paid at this stage of your journey. You are not a professional yet. Getting paid is what makes you a professional, not how good you are. There are plenty of people that have more knowledge and skill than me. Yet they are not doing it. There is a Chinese proverb that says "Those who say it can not be done, should get out of the way of those that are doing it." I use that all the time when someone tells me with case studies in hand, why what I am doing cannot be done.

At this point, it is good to have someone or a group of people who have successfully taken the less-traveled path to support you. The masses will try to pull you back into their world under the pretense that they are saving you from throwing everything you have a way and ending up with nothing. When the going gets rough, they will start to make sense. Without support from someone who has been through these times, your chances diminish.

You will keep your job and start in your spare time. Gradually getting things rolling until you have to make a decision to stay at the size you are. Or go all in and quit your present job. Through all this time a mentor who has gone before you is invaluable.

On The Job Training

There are plenty of people who went to college and studied to become a professional in a particular area of study. Many do not work in this area of study. They choose something different for various reasons after graduating from college. With a degree or not the 10,000-hour rule applies. You invest 10,000 into your goal, and you will be an expert in your chosen field.

Making it Big

Long before you become an expert, you will be successful at your chosen goal. You will be making enough money to support your family. You will be the envy of all the people you left behind that are "leading lives of quiet desperation." For they have sold out their dreams to play it safe. If they could admit to themselves that they sold out. They would tell you they are happy for you and wished they did what you did. But most will attribute your success to luck, or you cheated. You are now in the position to tell those leading lives of quiet desperation, they “can be anything you want to be”, too!  

My book "Preparing For The 7 Day Mental Diet" will help you show you how you can be anything you want to be. There is a link below to purchase the book.

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

The most important single step to huge success is Shoot for the stars. We had all dreamed big when we were kids. Most of us dreamed of being the President of the United States, sports star, astronaut, actor, model, writer, or a rock star... Being a writer was one for me.

These goals are pretty universal for most of us. Whatever your goal as a child was it did not take long for it to be labeled as foolish or impractical. If this did not happen to you, feel lucky. The adults in our life started to indoctrinate us into the world of practicality. All though well-meaning, practicality is not the path to fulfilling your dreams.

Very few of us were shown how to shoot for the stars. Our school systems are designed to get us to fall in line and be practical. There is no other way the schools can operate. You just need to know that this is the case so you can find the tools you need to find and follow your real dreams.

The most important single step to massive success is to find the talents God gave you and choose a big dream to use these talents. After you have found this dream make a decision to own it as your own.

What Does it Mean to Shoot for the Stars?

 Quite simply it means pulling out all the stops and doing everything you possibly can to get to where you need/want to be in life. Need and want's become one. If they are divided, then you will fail. When you find what your God-given talents are and you discover this dream inside you, it becomes a need. It is your destiny and purpose in life. This means putting 100% effort in and doing everything you possibly can to accomplish your aims.

I will use myself as an example. I always read a lot. When you read a lot, you dream of writing a book. I quit school. I was taught that this meant most doors would be shut to me when I quit school. My Dad taught me to work with what I had and never stop till you get it done. This took years before I figured out how to follow that training. In 2012 I stood in front of a group of men and told them if they were back in 2013 I would hand them a copy of a book I wrote.

At the time I did not know how to write, publish, design the cover, or pick and research a topic. I  shot for the stars. With only a dream and the commitment to write a book in 2013, I handed that group of gentlemen the book that I had written and published.

Accomplishing that dream empowered me to shut down the voices of practicality that warn me against failure and suggest the safe path in life.  The accomplished goal reminds me of what Henry Thoreau said: "most people lead lives of quiet desperation."  Since then I have written three other books. My last book "Discover Yourself Through Gratitude - A Journal" was the motivation to follow a dream of starting an online community where people can come and talk about developing Gratitude in their lives. That is how The Good Life Mall became a reality.

An indispensable tool in following my dreams is the people I choose to associate with. I need people

who dream big in my life. If you can not find other successful dreamers, use the people at The Good Life Mall till you do. Remember, the most important single step to immense success is to find your dream and go for it.

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You always have good intentions, yet procrastination cripples you. You find yourself looking for the magic wand on how to overcome procrastination. Here are 10 action steps that will lead you to become the person you always admired.

1. Set a Goal:

Let your mind develop a picture of the result you want. Now that you have the goal set, putting together an action plan will be easier. With the pictured outcome and a plan of action, you are armed for success.

2. Clear Your Mind:

Begin by clearing your mind of the clutter. Like a computer that is overloaded it crashes. You restart the computer and this gives you a fresh start. Put the pen to the paper and just write down every thought that comes to you. No editing necessary. Now your mind is clear and the plan of action is on the screen.

3. Make a List:

Write down the actions you will take the following day.  This is the work order your sub-conscious mind needs to develop a plan to accomplish the actions you have listed.

4. Small Steps:

We have devalued the penny to where it is worthless. No matter how you count it takes 100 pennies to make a dollar. It is the same with small steps. We have devalued small steps, always looking for the big score. Start taking small steps and you will bring back that sense of accomplishment to your life.

5. Be Accountable:

Pick a safe person to tell about your plan on how to overcome procrastination. This will help motivate you to take action. It is easy to tell yourself some silly excuse, but telling another person the same silly excuse will not be as easy. Talking about your accomplishments will give you a sense of pride. You will also get feedback on the steps you plan to take. Brainstorming is by product of these accountability sessions.

6. Remove Distractions:

Block out a period of time when you will take some action. No email, phone calls and social media and you will increase productivity. A singleness of purpose will get you to your desired goal faster than multi-tasking.

7. Change Your Mindset:

Use affirmations to change the negative scripts you have been telling yourself. Envision an action taker and give yourself the starring role in this movie. Do this all in the present tense. You have been doing this in the future tense and that has failed.

8. Stop Waiting For The Perfect Time:

The perfect time is very elusive. Few are the ones that find it. Right now is all you will ever have.  Start where you are with what you have.  These are the ingredients for the "Perfect Storm".

9. Be Consistent:

Do something every day that will lead you towards the end result you are looking for. This is how you discipline yourself and develop the habits you need to overcome procrastination.

10. Remove Analysis Paralysis:

Start making mistakes is the way to remove analysis paralysis from your life. Second guessing yourself and over-worrying about getting it wrong are crippling traits. No one has ever failed by making a mistake. You only fail when you quit trying.  When you make a mistake you will see a new path to achieve the desired result. Using these 10 action steps is how to overcome procrastination.

Image by Laura Retyi from Pixabay

Happy, successful people know how to use the power of positivity in your life. They know what they want and use their outlook to get it.

The movers and shakers in this life spend their time talking and thinking about how to achieve what they want from life. Focus your thoughts on happy things; your body will release endorphins. These endorphins give a feeling of well-being. Take time to let yourself absorb this feeling. It will not take long to acquire a positive attitude.

The Importance of Optimism

Psychological testing shows optimism allows them to live a better life. This quality that successful people use, the power of positivity, is within everyone's reach. If you think your case is different, stop, optimism is a learned behavior. If you were lucky enough to grow up in this atmosphere, good for you. If not find positive people and surround yourself with them.

The Happy Find The Good In The World

The optimists have two distinct ways of dealing with the world. Positivity is the advantage they have:

• First, they have pictures of their dreams. They stay focused on their vision and educate themselves on how to achieve it. They also remain confident in fulfilling their dream.
• Second, the optimist's do not feel like a victim in problematic situations. When things start to go south, they filter the lesson and use the knowledge to improve their performance.
Whatever you focus on will become larger. Actively look for the best in every person and situation will give you a cheerful, positive attitude.

The Power Of Positive Thinking
Optimists look at events logically and stay in control of their emotions. They do not seek to lay blame outside themselves. Putting blame takes up too much of the most precious thing we have, time.

Positive thinking has several benefits for your life:
Motivation: Discipline and positivity are traits of a sharp mind. Pessimistic thoughts result in adverse actions. To reshape your future, replace pessimism with optimism.

Healthy Relationships: Birds of a feather, flock together. Surround yourself with happy, successful people, and you will attract more positive thinking people into your life. Trusting people are positive people. Without trust, you can not build strong relationships. It is in our DNA to seek faith.

Confidence: Negativity corrodes our self-esteem and confidence. Loving yourself is the key to a happy future. Optimists glow, stand taller, love freely, and laugh at themselves.

Healthy Mind & Body: Negative thoughts suck the life out of you physically and mentally. Insomnia and struggling to rise in the morning are side-effects of negative thinking. Your mind and body will pay the price of fatigue, weakness, depression, and lack of motivation because of negative thoughts.

Choose Happiness
Is the glass half full or half empty, the choice is yours. Be grateful for what you have instead of what you do not have. Most people are honest and kind. Look at people and see they are doing the best they can with what they have. Tom T. Hall says it best "Lord do not let me judge them, but if I do, let me give them lots of room."
It is easy to be happy when you are dealt good cards. Your real character shows through when you play every hand with enthusiasm. Develop the power of positivity in your life; it will pay off.

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Once you build self-confidence, your life will take a turn for the better. Building confidence you will start to take risks. This puts you on the road to a brighter future, which before you could only dream about. When you establish the habit of taking risks, you put fear behind you. Self-confidence is the process of admitting you have things you dread doing, yet you are willing to push through and find a way to keep your fears from ruling your life. Feel the fear, just do not succumb to the fear. From here go out and build self-confidence for a better life.

Take Responsibility

When you establish self-confidence, you have gained control of your life. You will learn to accept the consequences of your actions good or bad. A self-confident individual will feel motivated to take responsibility while honestly looking at their mistakes and incorporating what they learned into their next adventure. Self-confident individuals will be at the head of the line when an opportunity presents itself.

The paradox is when you are willing to take risks to better your life, you are actually more relaxed. You will relax when plans go awry. An example, you had plans to accomplish something outdoors, and the weather changes you shift gears and find something else to do with your time and are just as happy with this activity.

You will need to learn how to trust yourself if you wish to be successful at bettering your life. A side-effect of believing in yourself is you will be able to trust others. Putting trust in others is difficult to do, yet when you trust yourself, you have the capacity to trust others. Sometimes your faith may be misplaced. Through experiencing your own failings, you are able to forgive others of theirs and move on.

Take Risks

You have a creative and analytical mind. Using both the creative and analytical as a team, you will create a life beyond your wildest dreams. Getting comfortable taking risks lets you entertain new ideas, that before would have been discounted as ridiculous. This world is full of options. You are the only one that can implement them in your life.

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More often then not, you will feel uncomfortable. This is a normal side-effect of taking risks. Keep your eye on the goal, and you will be willing to accept these painful times. The willingness comes because you can no longer accept the status quo. You must create "Your Hearts Desire." 

The key that unlocks the door of happiness is acceptance. When you learn to accept both the good times and the bad times, you have now entered a new dimension of existence where the outside world does not dictate how you feel. If you still use the events happening around you as the primary source for your feelings, reread this article and try again.

Do not tell yourself this must be what God wants for me. Dream big and go for it.  We put limitations on ourselves, no one else.  You are the only one who can build self-confidence for a better life.