Happiness (12)

We rush from task to task, making a daily concerted effort to complete something. Often, it feels as though you're trying to run up the down escalator. We speed along to the next thing, always in a rush to get it over with, to race to the next thing. Rarely do we reach what we consider to be our final destination. When we do manage it, we look around at the chaos we created and realize that it was all down to us. 

We are stressed out, completely exhausted by the daily grind. We never have enough time for the things we truly value or what we'd like to be doing. It might feel like there's no other choice, but the reality of the matter is that it doesn't need to be this way. You can live a simple life or at least simpler. You can enjoy life; you can find serenity instead of rushing from thing to thing. 5119510085?profile=RESIZE_400x

Everyone wants serenity. This elusive state that we are convinced only monks can achieve. Serenity makes you better equipped to handle life. You become more adept at handling problems. Once upon a time, something that seemed like a massive catastrophe is merely a small issue. 

You can react with clear, steady thinking. It's impossible to achieve this without effort. To become a serene person and live a calm life, you must build positive mental habits to create a peaceful mind. You need to eat well and exercise to support a healthy body. 

Simplify Life 

You can go Marie Kondo and toss everything that doesn't spark joy in your life. However, simplifying your life doesn't necessarily mean weighing up only material items. Look at your life. Are there things you're obsessed with? Do you have too much stuff? So much that it's packed away because you don't know what else to do with it? Do you have a nasty shopping habit, even though you don't need stuff?

This isn't about throwing everything away. It's about building a healthy relationship with material wealth and possessions.


Your ego can create havoc. It's always trying to prove you're better than everyone else. It judges, it compares, and it's exhausting. Try to pay more attention to it in action. You will see a difference between what you want to do versus what your ego suggests you do. Are you chasing a goal or a dream because it's what you want or because it feels like it's what you should want? The latter isn't going to help you find serenity. 

Let Go  

The anger and resentment you carry with you makes life heavy. You are going to experience disappointment because people will always let you down. It's natural. You can't influence the hurt they cause; you can only change your response to the pain they cause. It's time to give people the benefit of the doubt and assume the hurt is misguided versus intentional. It's an essential aspect of finding serenity. 

Mindfulness & Compassion

To find true serenity, you need to be mindful of your emotions, actions, and thoughts. Be conscious about what you say, how you act, how you feel, and what you think. Self-observation will help you understand yourself better, and meditation will help you transform yourself. Pay attention to your intentions and be willing to get to know yourself on a deeper level.

Compassion is something that you should extend to yourself as well as to others. Judge yourself less, be kind to yourself, revel in joy. Forgive, forget, practice compassion, and move forward. That is what it means to live a serene life and be peaceful.

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I've been where you are at the point where your life is embattled with chaos, both externally and internally. You're overrun with negative emotions, busy overthinking as you try to juggle your hectic schedule, and all the other stress that has landed on your doorstep.

There is no need to deny it. There is a peaceful place. We all know how draining life can is. Sometimes it seems hopeless. Sometimes you feel helpless. Sometimes it seems as though inner peace is an impossibility. Life is overwhelming! 4889097266?profile=RESIZE_400x

Dispel those fears right now because I want to provide you with the practices necessary to turn inner peace into a habit. In no time, it will just be another part of your day. Except this is one you'll look forward to because with it comes serenity.

  • Release Control

There is only one thing you have control over in this world, and it's you. You control your emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. That's it – not external circumstances, not other people. The only thing you control in those situations is how you respond. It is far more beneficial to your inner peace and happiness to recognize, understand, and remember this. The best thing you can do is let go and focus on you.

  • Unconditional Living

Does your mood depend on the conditions in your environment? Your spirit is high as you walk into work because you caught every green light on your commute. Your spirit is low as you walk into work because you caught every red light on your commute. Your children misbehaved, and it tipped you over the edge. Your children did their chores, and it dragged you back from the brink.

Do you see the problem? You're allowing yourself to live conditionally. You are being led by your environment and the behavior of others.

What does it all mean? If you want to find inner peace, you have to stop expending your emotional energy on the conditions around you. Unconditional living simply means that you won't let the conditions of your life influence how you feel.

  • Directed Focus

Directed focus is the most powerful aspect of turning inner peace into a habit. Think of sometime in your life when you felt at peace. When you become discontented, recall this time. Now look for gratitude in the situation you are experiencing, choosing what you focus on walks hand-in-hand with the previous point. When you decide to live unconditionally, you are shifting your focus from circumstance to self. While you will still be aware of what's going on around you, you aren't going to focus on all of that noise. You're only going to focus on creating the reality you want to live in.

  • Don't People Please

There are two reasons we tend to go out of our way to please others. The first is that we get satisfaction from being helpful. It gives you a little buzz. The second is we are too scared to say no and disappoint someone. The truth of the matter, though, is that people-pleasing just causes resentment, it stresses you out, and you get so busy pouring everything out into others you forget to refill your cup.

You can still help others, but don't break yourself at the expense of others.

The road that you walk to find inner peace will be an exciting journey. You will uncover many truths about yourself, as well as finding out how to handle stressful situations that life throws at you.

A relationship with the universe or a higher power is the one that will help you stay grounded. It's about knowing that everything will work out for you, even if it might not feel or look like it. Meditation is an excellent place to start getting in touch with it.

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Serenity is a state of being calm and at peace. Does it seem as though it is only a luxury afforded to monks and those without the daily struggles of “real” life

It doesn’t have to be. You are genuinely and completely capable of feeling calm and at peace, you have now by implementing a few mental and physical lifestyle habits.4773639492?profile=RESIZE_400x

Here are ten ways you can achieve serenity in your mind and your life

  1. Practice gratitude every day. Gratitude will allow you to focus on all the things you are happy to have in your life right now. Make a list of 10 things you are grateful for every day for 30 days and see how good it makes you feel.
  2. Do your best with what you have while working for what you want- Unfortunately, we can’t always have exactly what we want as soon as we decide we want it. Do you have dreams of living a life different than the one you are because you have responsibilities? Do you dream of traveling the world and working only on your laptop? Go to your day job every day and do your best, then come home and work towards making your dream come true so that you don’t have to choose one or the other and harbor feelings of resentment and dissatisfaction from a life wasted.
  3. Practice acceptance…understand that you can not control others. Understanding that you can not control others is the peacemaker. Have you noticed that spending time around certain people because they are manipulative or angry makes you feel a little overwhelmed? Accepting the fact that it is just the way they are and moving on with your day instead of trying to force someone to change will bring you peace.
  4. Fill your mind with positive influences – The information you watch on tv and read about affects how one thinks and feels. Have you noticed how bitter and cynical people tend to get when they spend their days watching the news? To achieve serenity, it is essential to fill your mind up with positive words and educational content that expands your mind and leads you closer to a relaxed state.
  5. Keep your home organized- It is hard to relax in a place that has clutter and dirty dishes and clothes laying around. Your home should be a place you come to and be able to relax and unwind. Your home should be a reflection of the life and feelings you aspire to have.
  6. Eat healthy meals that nourish your body- A healthy mind and body start with food. You can not live a healthy life while filling your body with toxic, addictive, food-like products you get from the standard American diet. Fuel your mind with good food, and you will increase feel-good hormones.
  7. Drink plenty of water- Water is the ultimate fuel for our bodies. We can not replace it with wine, coffee, and tea and expect to achieve a relaxed and peaceful state. Does caffeine make you jumpy or irritable? You may need to remove it from your diet altogether to feel relaxed during the day.
  8. Spend time outdoors- Take a break throughout your day and go for a nice quiet walk through nature. Humans are creatures meant to be close to nature, yet we are all disconnected from its power and beauty. Go for a walk every day without earbuds or cell phone in your hands and use your senses to enjoy the experience.
  9. Surround yourself with people that you enjoy being around- limit your time with drama queens and poor thinkers. While you can’t always eliminate people that bring you down all the time, you can limit the amount of time you spend with them. Allowing yourself ample opportunity to surround yourself with people that inspire you
  10. Focus on what you want-Do you live in a town that you feel is sucking the life out you? The more you focus on how much you hate it there, the more you will be put into situations where you are in a place you don’t enjoy. Instead, train your mind to focus only on things and places that you want more of in your life.


Achieving serenity in your mind and your life, can help you enjoy a less chaotic lifestyle and cultivate habits that hold you back from living your best life.


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Life can get stressful. This is an unavoidable fact, but it does not have to be stressful and overwhelming all of the time. Each one of us wants to achieve a stress-free and calm life. It may seem like an impossible task, but there are a few tips that you can follow to achieve a sense of calm and serenity in your daily life.

Be Thankful 

Practicing gratefulness is one of the many ways that you can turn your stress into a paradise. When life begins to get a bit overwhelming, take a moment to appreciate the things that you have to be grateful for.

Are you grateful for your children? Your home? Your job? The list is probably longer than you choose to acknowledge on a daily basis.4607941869?profile=RESIZE_400x

Be Positive

It takes no effort to be negative. Every happening in our daily lives can easily turn into a major complaint. However, it is also possible to adopt the opposite type of mindset. Rather than complaining, find the positive in the situations that appear in your daily life.

As your mind wanders in the direction of the negative again, force yourself to maintain your positive outlook. Over time, being positive will become a lot easier than it is at first. You may also begin to rub off on others around you which is simply a fringe benefit. 

Be Nice to People

Being kind to others goes a long way in bringing about a peaceful everyday experience. If someone makes your life difficult, you can choose to be nice. Your kind attitude will pay dividends in peace and serenity.

Be Neat and Tidy

Keeping your home clean and tidy is another great way to reduce stress and anxiety. Clutter is often a culprit for stress and anxiety, and unfortunately, this is often overlooked by those who are suffering from these ailments.

Taking a day to tidy your home, car, workspace, or anywhere else where you spend time can greatly enhance your sense of calm.

Be Quiet

A negative side-effect of the increasing technology in our lives is that we rarely enjoy a quiet moment anymore. However, enjoying quiet time is actually really beneficial for our peace and serenity.

Watching television should not be a major part of your day. Making the choice to enjoy the quiet can actually do a great deal of good for enhancing your calm and serenity.

The Payoff

Practicing ways to achieve peace and serenity in your everyday life is not an easy task. This is a task that takes determination and the commitment to follow through. Attaining peace and serenity is something you do not want to miss. Overcoming all of the negative aspects of your daily life will give you a relaxed feeling in any situation. Nothing else will pay such high dividends.

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Many minds these days live in internal chaos. We worry all the time, we’re jealous and greedy, and we’re continually trying to be and have more than we are. What our minds need is the opposite of internal chaos. Our minds need Serenity.

Serenity is a state of being calm, peaceful, and untroubled. A mind with Serenity will not harm others. It will be patient and kind. It will not suffer anxious or depressed thoughts. It will merely be.4542315683?profile=RESIZE_400x


If you’re feeling overwhelmed, put on your favorite song, after listening for a bit, you will begin to relax. You will feel energized and calmer. Music is an outlet for pent up anger and pain, so use it! Release those feelings and return to your Serenity.


Meditation is a big deal these days, and you may be tired of hearing about it. Don’t tell me you can’t sit still and scroll to the next bold word. Stop, read, and focus. If you can’t sit still, that is an obstacle to Serenity. It may allude to more significant problems like anxiety or pent up energy you need to use.

Meditation is a practice that puts you into your body at the moment. Thoughts and feelings will flash through your head, but you are not to indulge them. Let them roll on by like a car on the road outside. You are serene.

There are many ways to meditate. You can focus on a flame or picture, you can focus on your breath, and you can download an app of your choice for guided meditation. Like anything, you should start small if you can’t sit still, just to do it for a minute. Then up to it three the next week.

Stop Multitasking

Some people claim they’re better at tasks when they multitask. That has proven false. You may merely feel like you are doing better while multitasking. Maybe you need to do something with your hands while you listen to a speaker, for instance. That is a focus technique, however, and not multitasking.

If you are doing your hair, on the phone, and trying to eat all at once, then you aren’t doing any of them very well. You might drop crumbs in the sink and mess up your hair. Focus on one task at a time. This will allow you to devote the proper amount of attention to each different task so that you can do peacefully do them right.

Take Breaks

Don’t forget to take a deep breath, step outside, or go for a walk. Breaks are essential and no matter who you are, you need them. Your eye health will also improve from frequent screen time breaks. So, find something that works for you!

Some people need more breaks than others, and that’s fine. What’s important is that you give yourself some rest after prolonged productivity. Maybe a sudoku game or quick round of solitaire will work for you. Getting outside is also great for your health, so go out there and take a walk.

Create a Serenity Trigger

A serenity trigger can be anything you focus on to remind you of Serenity. For instance, author, Carolyn Rubenstein, says that her serenity trigger is an “image of a beautiful flower blooming within a simple mason jar.” When visualized, it reminds her “to take a few minutes away from what she’s doing to find serenity amidst the chaos.”

Your serenity trigger can be anything. Maybe it’s a picture of your family or significant other that you keep in your wallet. Perhaps it’s the sound of a waterfall or an accessory you can wear. Find something that makes you feel peace and use it as your serenity trigger.

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Is Inner Peace Eluding You?

Inner peace is the feeling of freedom and tranquility within oneself. It is the ability to feel confident and satisfied with the life you are living, free from stress and anxiety. How many people do you think have mastered inner peace and can live a full, rewarding life because of it?

Inner peace is not something manypeopleknow in today’s modern world. After all, the world is fast-moving, and if we don’t keep up, we will surely be left behind.4522713199?profile=RESIZE_400x

It keeps us up at night and brings about crippling anxiety treated with antidepressants and addictive foods that destroy our mind and body that often leaves us with chronic lifestyle-related illnesses like depression and obesity.

Is your mind always at war with your heart?

Does stress, overwhelming to-do-lists, and chronic overthinking leave you feeling drained and unmotivated?

Or are you one of the lucky ones that left the career they hated to chase after their passions or sold their big fancy house to move to a foreign country and sell paintings by the bay?

Inner peace often eludes us when we are living a life not meant for us. That can mean many different things to different people. Maybe you live in a town that sucks the life out of your adventurous spirit. Or your career path is slowly poisoning you with tedious routine stacks of paperwork. Perhaps chronic stress is so out of control that your inner peace has disappeared.

“Few things are more disconcerting than living a life you weren’t meant to live.” Stacy Brookman

Signs you struggle with inner peace

  1. You compare yourself to others
  2. You can’t say no
  3. Your mind is always racing
  4. Little things become big things
  5. You’re to-do-list is monumental, and it makes you overwhelmed
  6. Your home and work environment is a mess
  7. You procrastinate often
  8. You focus on things you can’t control

Are you struggling to find inner peace? Here is what you can do about it right now

  1. Use social media as a source of enjoyment, not to see what others are doing. Funny cat video, anyone?
  2. Meditate every day. Nothing is more effective for calming the mind and creating a peaceful internal environment than meditation.
  3. Learn to say no.
  4. Practice relaxing with deep breathing or schedule time for a massage.
  5. Ask yourself, will this matter in 5 years? If not, let it go.
  6. Schedule your to-do-list in blocks. If you don’t get a project done in the allotted amount of time, then you will have to come back to it the next time.
  7. Clean your house/workspace. If you don’t have time, hire a professional organizer.
  8. Do the things you enjoy doing first.
  9. Focus only on what you can control. That is you. You are the only thing, person, and event you can control.

Is inner peace eluding you? Are you feeling lost on the next course of action? Life coaches can be a great starting point. They often help you figure out where you are struggling and help you come up with a plan that is going to help you reach your end goal, AKA satisfaction, and happiness with your life.

A holistic health coach will help you examine all areas in your life that may be out of balance, but a career or life coach can also help you change direction in areas you are unsatisfied with and work towards creating inner peace for yourself.

It is never too late to start over, change course, or do something new. You can achieve inner peace. This is your life, and you are the only one responsible for making it into your idea of peace and happiness. So, what are you going to do about it?

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Would you like to achieve inner peace? Are you exhausted by the guilt, pain, and resentment you have carried through life? Are you tired of responding impulsively, negatively, or overreacting? If everyone were honest, they would admit that negative moods influence them sometimes.

It doesn't matter how sincere you are. These old habits die hard. They aren't harmless bad habits; they are stealing your joy. It all throws us off-center, and ultimately, it makes you unable to cope with life effectively.4520610154?profile=RESIZE_400x

You cannot find inner peace and tranquility when you don't feel great. That means you need to look after every aspect of yourself, spirituality, physically, emotionally, mentally, and intellectually. Look after yourself, and your body will respond in kind.

  1. Meditate

The power of meditation cannot be underestimated. While experts may spend hours in meditation, you don't have to. Create a daily schedule that dedicates 10 to 15 minutes to meditation. Meditation is all about clearing your mind and learning to be present. As you meditate, your focus should solely be on your breath.

When you focus on your breath, it allows you to push everything else out of your mind. With every inhale/exhale, push negativity from your mind and embrace the inner peace and tranquility. Meditation is a great solution when you're feeling stressed out. It's something that you can do anywhere and everywhere, but make sure you dedicate some time to meditate quietly at home. Anything else you do is gravy.

  1. Mindfulness 

Mindfulness is not the same as meditation, though it's possible to practice mindful meditation. When you're mindful, you're fully present. You become completely aware of your sense of smell, touch, taste, hearing, and sight.

You can practice mindfulness when you eat when you listen to music when you take a hike. It's merely about engaging all of your senses to push everything else out of your mind. There is less time to worry when you're focusing on reality. You're living instead of thinking about what-ifs. 

  1. Deep Breathing

Deep breathing is an activity that promotes inner peace and tranquility, similarly to meditation and mindfulness. There are a wide variety of deep breathing exercises that you can use. Here is one fostering inner peace and tranquility.  You imagine your breath as colors. You assign a color to positivity and one to negativity.

As you inhale, You see yourself drawing in blue air. It's all positivity. When you exhale, you imagine a rush of black air being expelled from your lungs. It's all negativity. You inhale positivity, and you exhale negativity. This simply adds an extra layer of stress relief to the deep breathing practice. The purpose of deep breathing to promote inner peace is that your mind is drawn to the process of breathing and it's life-enhancing properties.

Take a deep breath in through your nose, focus on your diaphragm as you do, and hold it for a few beats before you expel it from your mouth. Repeat this five times.

  1. Be True To Yourself

How can being true to yourself be an activity? When you are in harmony with yourself, you will behave how you think and feel.

The problem comes in when you see yourself as one thing, but our actions portray another person. You can use a notebook to keep track of incongruence. This is something you can correct if you develop self-awareness and try to act in line with your values.

  1. Gratitude

If you want to promote inner peace and tranquility, then you need to focus on all of the positivity in your life. A gratitude journal is an excellent way to remind yourself of everything you love in life. Once you start writing out what you're grateful for, you will find it easier to see more positives. It's all about training yourself to be more aware of the positive things in life.

I wrote a book on developing gratitude. It is available at Amazon. Use the link below.

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We all talk about finding inner peace and serenity, but few understand how they can apply these practices to themselves. Buddhist philosophers like Gandhi have described inner peace as the essential aspect of life, and the only way to feel genuinely happy and prosperous.         

Inner peace is described as a deliberate state of spiritual calmness without sufferings or mental disturbances. It is about finding a sense of calm where the mind functions at its optimal point regardless of one’s surroundings. With enough strength and practice, one can find this sense of inner peace even when faced with stress and anxiety. 4508935716?profile=RESIZE_400x        

Serenity comes from the Latin word serenus, which means clear or unclouded. Serenity is a mental state in which an individual feels calm and untroubled while truly at peace with themselves. It allows an individual to stay true to themselves and not let their surroundings impact their state of mind. It can be beneficial in overcoming hardships when frequently practiced. 

There are many ways to practice a feeling of inner peace and serenity, and eventually, you will be able to experience it in a very natural way.

Feeling at peace with yourself in a state of serenity throughout the day allows the mind to function in a very positive way and has tons of benefits on your quality of life.

There are many ways to find serenity and inner peace. Many of these strategies have been practiced for hundreds of years.

Meditation is the best way to calm the wandering mind and feel genuinely relaxed and at peace. Meditation allows you to let go of the trauma and negative self-talk that follow you throughout the day by clearing the cloudy mind.           

Meditation simply can calm the mind and let go of all thoughts to become present with reality and observe and acknowledge your surroundings. It allows you to feel less overwhelmed when negative emotions arise and not let emotional disturbances impact your life.

Meditation allows you to be mentally strong and maintain a sense of inner peace and serenity throughout your day, regardless of the stressors that come about. When you sit with these emotions and thoughts and can observe them, you can make important realizations about yourself that allow you to understand who you truly are.           

Practicing acceptance is another way to experience constant serenity throughout your daily life. By accepting the curveballs that life may throw at you, you will no longer let things bother you as much as you have in the past.          

Accepting uncertainty and understanding that you cannot predict the future or change the past allows you to feel present in the moment and let go of the wandering thoughts. Finding a sense of acceptance for what is and what will be, will enable you to be more alert and focused on what is in front of you while feeling calm and unbothered.          

Another way to maintain a sense of inner peace is to keep your environment organized and clean. When you look around your room and see a mess of clothes and other belongings, it is easy to feel overwhelmed and stressed. This stress you experience will likely be carried with you throughout the rest of your day and will make you not perform at your best.          

By decreasing clutter and keeping your environment free of distraction, you will feel relaxed and feel a sense of serenity when you are home or at work. By changing the things in your environment that are in your control, you will feel more comfortable in your surroundings and will be able to focus within.

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5 Beliefs That Block Inner Peace

Many people look to outside factors and their surroundings in an attempt to find inner peace without even realizing it. Inner peace can only come within and stems from our deeply rooted beliefs about ourselves and the way we react to different situations.         

There are many beliefs that you have likely experienced subconsciously that sink your sense of self-confidence and overall happiness. By analyzing the thoughts and beliefs that occur in your mind each day, you can shift to a more positive and confident outlook on a life full of peace and serenity.4500212502?profile=RESIZE_400x

“Once I get what I want, I will feel better.”

This belief is a common way that we get wrapped up in our surroundings and allow them to guide us and determine our wellbeing. When we understand that feeling good and being happy comes from within, we will no longer experience these restricting views.

To truly practice gratitude and be present in the moment, we have to allow our inner peace to guide us regardless of our situations or aspirations. Although it is important to have desires and goals, it is important not to let them determine our quality of life and satisfaction on the inside.

“People are always out to get me.”

Although we do not usually say this out loud, our subconscious holds restricting beliefs like these that prevent us from achieving our goals and aspirations. When you are always focused on what others think of you and how they will react, the anxiety guides your life, and you will not feel at peace on the inside.

Rather than expecting that people are going against you, accept the fact that not everyone will like you and let go of seeking approval from others. Allowing others to have their own opinions and not being afraid of them or letting them get in the way of your views can allow you to get a lot further in your life than you would expect 

“I should be able to work harder.”

Comparing our work ethic or other components of our lives like appearance or social skills blocks our confidence and prevents us from experiencing inner peace. Although you may look at others and think that they are better than you, you have to realize that everyone is different, and comparison can only hold you back.

Focusing on how you can improve your qualities and traits rather than trying to be like someone else can make you feel less stressed, and you will, in turn, have higher confidence levels.

Comparison can have negative impacts on friendships and even relationships and will always get in the way of inner joy and happiness. 

“I could never do that.” 

Doubting yourself and your capabilities is one of the most powerful ways that your subconscious restricts you from achieving your desires and goals. When you see someone performing on stage or completing something you have always aspired to do, it can be easy to think that you could never be capable.

When you think of these things, you are not able to have the confidence you need to accomplish these things. Taking a step back and realizing that you can achieve anything that you put your mind to will allow you to be more motivated and at peace from within. 

“Inner peace is impossible.”

When we read books about meditation and other peace techniques, it can be easy to feel overwhelmed and not capable. It can feel like these qualities take years and years to build up, and we have to make a lot of sacrifices to experience inner peace. 

Often the best way to find inner peace is by letting go of these assumptions and just starting with slowly adjusting your daily life. You will likely see the results sooner than you think, and inner peace will flow naturally.

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Making Other People Happy


When people themselves are happy, they experience positive feelings which they attribute as being something good. But when people make others happy, it elevates those positive feelings even further. There is no doubt that people love to make others happy. In fact, if you are ever feeling down yourself, one way to bring yourself up is to find ways to make others happy. This will give you the feeling of peace and contentment you are looking for.

When you strive to make others happy, they notice. They will get a boost in their mood which you will see that reaction in their face immediately. It may even be returned to you in kind, either immediately, or sometime in the future.

The great part about making others happy is it is relatively easy to do. It can be as simple as paying someone a compliment. Or it can be helping out a colleague whose workload is overextended. Sometimes, simply thanking someone can lift up their spirits no matter how small the task that you are thanking them for is.

One really easy way to make people happy is to smile. Smiling is a warm and friendly act that most people will respond to positively by smiling back. A smile is a form of welcoming and shows that you are opening yourself up to those people. It gives people an invitation to approach you.

Another way to make someone happy is to simply listen to them. You will be amazed at how this everytime you apply it . People aren’t usually good listeners so if you stand out as

If you want to go a step further in making others happy, try to learn more about the people that you want to make happy. Be interested in what they do. Then, if you see something related to their interests, either bring it to their attention or give them something related that shows you were paying attention.

It’s important to be genuine when making others happy and not use it as a form of manipulation. People will pick right up on that tactic and it is sure to backfire on you. Since it doesn’t really work anyway, why bother even trying it? People will appreciate you much more and will respond positively to your efforts to make them happy instead of trying to get something out of it for yourself. They will also be more willing to make you happy when the effort is real. You gather more bees with honey, then vinegar.

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What Makes People Happy

What makes people happy? If you have been struggling with trying to be happy yourself, perhaps it’s time to see how happy people are doing it. By learning what they do, you can emulate them for success.

  1. People go between states of emotions regularly.
    You can be happy for a short period, and then you are thinking about something that stresses you out. Even people who seem happy go through changes in emotion. These people are more likely to be content. No one is truly happy all the time. It is important not to judge your insides by other peoples outsides, so you don’t put too much pressure on yourself when you see others who seem happy.3339718244?profile=RESIZE_710x
  2. Consider what you have in life.
    Are you in good health? If you aren’t in good health and can do something about it, then that is a crucial area on where to focus. Learn how to eat right, even if you have to hire a nutritionist. Incorporate exercise into your routine. A gym is not necessary to get in shape. You can become healthier by walking frequently.
  3. Happiness is not just about money.
    Although having enough to provide for your family is less stressful, people who are happy in life know that money is a tool like any other. It makes whatever you are doing easier. When people become obsessed with money, they can usually obtain it. But, it doesn’t lower their stress. The obsession often raises anxiety because it becomes the sole focus.
  4. Happy people don’t chase dollars.
    They are content with what they are doing and focus on providing an excellent product. Money is a by-product of providing a good service. Happy people often are experts in what they do. You give enough people what they want you can have anything you want.
  5. It’s rare to find people who are happy and don’t have any friends.
    Socializing is a significant factor when trying to be happy. You don’t need dozens of friends. When you have a few that you can trust, that will be all that is necessary. It’s okay to use social media to connect, but if you can get together in person, that is even better.
  6. Try to make your home an environment where everyone feels safe.
    People who are happy, know that family is important. They know that their homes should be a sanctuary. If it’s not, they take steps to correct the situation. Spending time with family is a part of what makes people happy.

Action steps:

  1. Make a list of what you currently have. List both material items and intangible items. Sometimes, all that is needed to snap out of a bad mood is to refer to your list. You will see that your life is not bad, and you have most, if not all, of what you need.
  2. Come up with a meal plan for the next thirty days. Work with a nutritionist and get a solid plan. Eating the right foods will help you improve your attitude. It will give you more energy and will start to make you feel better. Eating right can only make you happier.
  3. Set up a time to hang out with close friends once per month. If you have lost touch with some people, try to reconnect. You could also try making new friends. Make it a point to go to in-person locations. You can find them in the local paper or take a look online for meetings that are happening in your area.
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Many childhood fairy tales end with the phrase, “…and they lived happily ever after.” Unfortunately, as we mature, we realize that happiness isn’t simply finding your “Prince Charming,” or discovering a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

But, many of us are still waiting for that knock on the door or that special “gift” or achievement that will bring us true happiness for the rest of our lives. We don’t realize that happiness is a journey – a pursuit that takes us down a long road of learning and weeding out those things in our lives that cause unhappiness or that we have to work at to overcome.

How do you know when you’re happy? It’s a surge of well-being that puts a smile on your face and a skip in your steps. You may know it when you feel it, but it only lasts a little while – like the first time you see your baby smile or celebrating that big promotion.

To find real and lasting happiness in your life, you need first to explore what you believe about happiness. What if you have it in one area of your life and not another?

Happiness is a pursuit that you have to work at -- and to do that you need to know what it is and what it means to have it in your own life.  

What is Happiness?

The dictionary defines happiness with many words such as contentment, joy, glee, good spirits and well-being. It’s a state of mind rather than a tangible object that you can hold in your hand and use when you need it most.

But, happiness is difficult to come by unless you know what will help you experience it. You may think that good luck in the form of a promotion, a windfall of cash or a loving relationship would bring happiness to your life.

You may be surprised once you reach those goals, that happiness is still eluding you. You may even think there’s something wrong with you because you can’t seem to grasp that ultimate goal of true happiness, no matter what good comes into your life.

The problem may be that you’re limiting yourself to happiness only in certain areas of your life. Maybe you’ve achieved business or relationship success, but still, feel a void that keeps you from being happy about it. You know you’re unhappy, but you don’t understand why.

Broadening your scope of happiness to other areas of your life can help you to understand what real pleasure is and to pursue it in a systematic way that’s sure to enhance your lifestyle and finally bring joy into those areas that were lacking.

How to Pursue Happiness

You may not realize that happiness is a life-long pursuit and not an “event” of something particular. Everyone has a right to pursue happiness. It’s so important that it’s even included in the Constitution of the United States as an “inalienable” right.

To pursue the happiness you’re entitled to, you need to know how to do it correctly. There are some direct routes to that sense of well-being and some ways that will never get you there.

The route to happiness begins with assessing the most critical areas of your life and discerning if you’re happy in that area. Are you emotionally satisfied – does your spiritual life need some more work to be happier?

Your relationships, job, and physical well-being are all part of the circle of happiness. If one link is broken, you aren’t as wholly fulfilled as you could be.

Think about various areas of your life and whether you’ve achieved the happiness level you long for. For example:

Physical Fitness – You may be happy with your weight, but how about your physical stamina? If you need to add another dimension to your fitness routine (or begin one), it will not only help you have more self-esteem to follow through and succeed – it will make you happy. Your physical well-being is a vital link in the happiness circle.

Spirituality – You don’t have to belong to a church or to a particular religion to gain happiness from spirituality. Connecting with nature and helping others are just two examples of how you can find and enjoy spirituality in your own life. Developing and living a belief system is vital to your overall happiness.

Love Yourself – You won’t be very loveable to others if you can’t love yourself. Love yourself enough to take care of yourself, to make time for only you and to build your self-esteem by surrounding yourself with positive people rather than negative ones. When you love who you are, a certain level of happiness is reached that others can’t provide.

Take Care of Yourself – Get plenty of sleep, eat a healthy diet and get enough exercise to feel better and have more energy for things you want to do. A big part of happiness is good health, so take steps to improve that link in the circle if needed.

You can probably think of other areas in your life that need work to make you enjoy and be happy with them. Research happiness as you would a place you’re moving to or a career path you think you want to take. Leave no stone unturned in your quest for happiness.  

Looking for Happiness in All the Wrong Places

Every day, we’re bombarded with advertisements about “things” that can make us happy – a new car, bypass surgery to lose weight, a different hairstyle or a new dating partner. Billions of dollars are spent each year on things that are touted as “sure things” to make us happy and content.

You may feel great when you first drive that new car, lose weight or sport that new hairstyle, but eventually the glitter wears off, and you’re left with the same unhappiness you felt before you bought the “things.”

Contrary to popular belief, that multi-million dollar home, expensive jewelry, exotic cars, and world travel doesn’t bring automatic happiness to your life. There’s no doubt that money can make your life easier, but it can’t make you happy unless everything else falls into place.

The world is full of mega-rich people and families who live their everyday lives in the throes of depression and unhappiness. There are many reasons why money isn’t making these people happy.

Lousy health could be one reason, and fighting and angry discourse about the money they have could be another. Inner happiness isn’t determined by how many things you can buy or how many degrees you’ve obtained – it’s an emotion that’s both elusive and attainable – if you know how to pursue it.

Pursuing happiness is the right of all of us, but it may not be easy for some. It helps to visualize happiness as a circle which is linked together by several happiness goals and methods of achieving those goals.

When there is happiness in each link of the circle, true happiness is achieved, but a break or crack in a relationship can cause the sphere to weaken, and your joy won’t be complete.

Rather than spinning your wheels in trying to bring happiness to your life on outside pursuits, it’s far more effective to pursue happiness from the inside. Studies of history and recent research prove that materialistic comforts haven’t led to complete satisfaction.

Part of the problem is not knowing what will make us happy – and part of it is not knowing how to pursue it. Whatever we seem to do and acquire, happiness remains out of reach.

Just as true happiness is often confused with acquiring things, the pursuit of happiness can be confused with having a “perfect” life – which isn’t attainable. We can reach a level of contentment that makes us complete without always having things go our way.

Problems and obstacles are needed in our lives so we can learn along the way. It may be challenging to feel grateful for a problem, but viewing it in that light can bring a type of happiness into our lives.  

Giving Happiness a Chance

After you take a careful look at your present life and what makes you happy – and what doesn’t, you’ll be better able to formulate a plan for happiness. Rather than waiting for it to arrive at your doorstep, you’ll have a clear path of how to pursue it.

Rather than spending your hard-earned money on things that will make you happy for a few minutes or a day, spend it on gathering knowledge and experiences that will improve your outlook on life and make you a better person.

One way to make yourself happy is to become debt-free. Pay off those high-interest accounts and begin to save money for pursuing what you love in life. Maybe you could take more trips or invest in the education of a child.

Those types of things you can do for yourself will serve to bring more lasting happiness than material things and boost your self-esteem and life-experiences. Donating your time to a worthy cause rather than writing a check is also a great way to get in touch with who you really are and what makes you happy.

If you don’t have peace of mind, begin now to discover what happiness means to you and how you can pursue it successfully. It’s a journey that will bring you much satisfaction and finally complete the circle with links that genuinely make you happy.

Image by Andi Graf from Pixabay     Image by rawpixel from Pixabay

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