Are you a friend to yourself? Do you know how to take care of your needs? Do you take care of yourself? If not, you need to learn how and begin to do so as soon as possible, and you are the only one that can. One of the key elements of self-care is standing up for yourself, no matter the situation.
Standing up for yourself takes courage, especially after something that you tried didn’t work out. However, sticking up for yourself is essential. When people personally attack us, usually they are trying to gain power over us.
Identify Your “Weakness”
The first part of standing up for yourself is identifying the personal trait behind what’s going on. That’s the trait that will be under attack if things don’t work out.
Did your inventiveness lead you to try something that no one had tried before? Did your bravery lead you to take on a task that no one had dared? These are positive traits, but they will be under attack as those around you try to pin it on you.
These are positive traits and, while it is essential to understand where things went wrong to avoid future mistakes, it is also vital to not let one failure or error allow others to attack your personality.
Know “The System”
A critical part of standing up for yourself is recognizing the systems that are set up to keep groups of people accountable. These systems are also designed to give a smooth flow to projects. Systematic problems or limitations were likely a contributing factor in things not working out – or in people trying to convince you that things didn’t work out. However, in most cases, systems are the reason that you need to stand up for yourself.
Usually, when people attack us for things, it is because they are trying to establish blame because if they don’t blame someone else, someone will blame them.
Understanding the system in which you operate can help you to navigate that system, even when it seems to be working against you.
Offer a Solution
Standing up for yourself shouldn’t be a simple, selfish act. If things aren’t going well, you’re likely to come under attack. When you do, drawing a line in the sand will only get you so far. You’ll also need to offer a solution to the situation. Don’t just come up with a defense for yourself, come up with a new offense for the situation that got you here.
Pick Your Battles
Finally, standing up for yourself may mean giving some ground. Sometimes you need to admit that something didn’t work out and ask for help. There’s something to be said for defending your position and never giving an inch, but if it blinds you and you are unable to brainstorm with others, it becomes a defect in your character. Fighting a battle with no other payoff than winning the fight is a waste of your time.
Standing up for yourself is a meaningful way to maintain faith in all of the quality’s that make you excel because people are more likely to prey on your failures than praising your successes.
The idea of standing up for yourself means admitting when things aren’t working and determining ways to move forward without giving up on yourself because things didn’t go as planned.
Take the time to learn this critical life skill, and you will see significant improvements in your ability of standing up for yourself.