People are different. While this seems like an obvious statement, don’t take it lightly. Because people are different, this means that you will never be able to please everyone. Therefore, stop trying to do so. Instead, focus on pleasing yourself. Those who love and respect you will also love and respect you for doing this. They may not agree with you, but they won’t stop being your friend because of it. Trying to please everyone pleases no one.
Some people will disassociate with you if you don’t please them. Forget about them. They aren’t worth the brain power expended. Move on with your life, and don’t worry about what they think. If they aren’t pleased by your actions, probably nothing will ever bring them around.
Of course, you shouldn’t trample on people. If your actions are such that you are doing wrong by others, they have the right to be upset with you. In these cases, you need to reevaluate what you are doing and adjust accordingly. You want to be happy, but you want to do it with integrity. "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
When your decisions are about you or your family, then you should follow your moral values, trying to please everyone pleases no one. Another good motto to live by is – “what people say about you is none of your business.” When you repeat that motto, it helps you to move on and care less what people think. People are going to have their opinions no matter what you do. You may as well make yourself happy rather than others.
Another point is you are the only one responsible for the decisions you make. You must live with those decisions. Others may think they know what’s best for you, but they don’t. You make that determination yourself, and you need to take responsibility for those decisions.
If you make decisions to make others happy, you would not be able to blame your choices on them. They probably wouldn’t accept such blame anyway. People will make excuses, such as they didn't have all of the facts. Or, they will say the situation is different because it was you and not them. These are more reasons not to worry about what people think and live your life to keep your self-respect. Read the poem“The Man in The Glass” till you internalize the poem. Trying to please everyone pleases no one.
Comments
As Todd used to say, "This article was written just for me"!! This article was full of valuable information for me. And I see alot of what you wrote as progress happening in my life. I'm still often concerend of what people think of me, but less now than ever before. There is a huge freedom in this. Walking around always worrying about what other people think of me takes an exhorbitant amount of energy and it's draining. When I focus on living my life and letting go of what other people think, I feel lighter. The reality is that I cannot please everyone. I have heard the saying, "What other people think about you is none of your business", and its true. As crazy as it sounds, I have lived my life in a way trying to make everyone around me happy, it's pretty insane. "Trying to please everyone pleases no one", I can't get this out of my head, it's really good. My mantra for the day, maybe the week.